Category Archives: Best Blackadder Quotes

Find all the best Blackadder Quotes online here!

The best Blackadder Quotes online

There is a popular phrase – “A Blackadder Quote a Day keeps the cretins away”. OK, perhaps that is not an official saying, but it should be! Never a day goes by, when I don’t quote Blackadder at least once. And even if I don’t actually quote from the show, I give a ‘BAHHH’ General Melchett style!

If you are looking to find the best Blackadder quotes online, then check out this collection. Blackadder quotes are updated daily, and so you can pick a new one every day of the year!

As well as our Blackadder quotes, you can also find series and episode descriptions, as well as complete scripts for all the shows. It is like Blackadder heaven!

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Blackadder and Baldrick Turnip Quotes Part 1

Turnips are a recurring theme in Blackadder, probably because they are the same shape as a thingey. Here’s the best Baldrick turnip quotes from the first two series of Blackadder.
Blackadder turnip quotes

The Best Turnip Quotes from Blackadder

Have you ever dreamed of a great big turnip in the country? Let’s check out the Blackadder turnip quotes through the first two series. We’ll do the last series next week!

Blackadder Series 1 Turnips

The word turnip first gets mentioned in the very first episode, of Blackadder in the first series – The Foretelling when the new King Richard gives a speech. read more

Blackadder’s Best Insults – Blackadder put-downs throughout the ages

Let’s take a like at some of Blackadder’s best insults, snide remarks, and put-downs throughout the ages. Do you remember them all?
Blackadder's best insults - the top 25 best Blackadder insults

Blackadder’s Best Insults

The Blackadder dynasty lasted for hundreds of years, and during that time, the sarcasm gene was sharply refined. Here are some of Blackadder’s best insults from series 1 all the way through to the Blackadder specials.

1. ‘Baldrick, does it have to be this way? Our valued friendship ending with me cutting you up into strips and telling the prince that you walked over a very sharp cattle grid in an extremely heavy hat?’
Blackadder Series 3 Episode 6 Duel and Duality read more

Game of Adders Black Part 2 – Blackadder meets Game of Thrones

Continuing last week’s Blackadder and Game of Thrones mashups, here’s some more great images of the two legendary shows combined. A Game of Adders Black.

Who's Queen? A Game of Adders Black

A Game of Adders Black Part 2

Here are some more of the most popular Blackadder quotes combined with images from Game of Thrones.

Millionaire Aristocrat

A Game of Adders Black - Comning Blackadder with Game of Thrones

This Blackadder quote is from Ink and Incapability, where Blackadder describes that there is always something wrong.

Baldrick: Something wrong, Mr. B?

Edmund: Oh, something’s always wrong, Balders. The fact that I’m not a millionaire aristocrat with the sexual capacity of a rutting rhino is a constant niggle. But, today, something’s even wronger. That globulous fraud, Dr. Johnson, is coming to tea. read more

Am I jumping the gun, Baldrick, or are the words I Have A Cunning Plan Marching…

Am I jumping the gun Baldrick, or are the words I have a cunning plan marching with ill-deserved confidence in the direction of this conversation?

I Have A Cunning Plan

This is one of our favourite cunning plan quotes!

Am I jumping the gun Baldrick?

This Blackadder quote is from the third series. The episode is Nob and Nobility.

Here’s another Cunning Plan moment

A history of Cunning Plans

Are you interested in finding out who used the phrase ‘I have a cunning plan’ the most times? Then take a look here – I have a cunning plan. It breaks down who said the phrase, and how many times in each episode. read more

I laugh at danger, and drop ice cubes down the vest of fear

Ha ! I laugh at danger and drop ice cubes down the vest of fear. From the third series of Blackadder – Amy and Amiability.

I Laugh at Danger from Blackadder

We love this Blackadder quote from Amy and Amiability. In fact, it was only recently that we realised how many other great quotes there were in the episode. Let’s take a look at some of them.

Great Quotes from Amy and Amiability

I’d no more place my daughter in the hands of an unworthy man than I’d place my John Thomas in the hands of a lunatic with a pair of scissors.

The girl is wetter than a haddock's bathing costume

She is famous for having the worst personality in Germany and, as you can imagine, that’s up against some pretty stiff competition. read more

Blackadder the Third Face-off – Evil Revolutionary Vs Wellington

Every week, we are going to run a Blackadder face-off, where we put two characters head to head. Which one is your favourite from these two?
Blackadder the Third Face-off

Evil Revolutionary vs Wellington

To kick off our Blackadder face-off series, we’ve put two characters from Blackadder the Third head-to-head. On the left, we have the Evil Revolutionary, played by comedy legend Chris Barrie. On the right, we have The Duke of Wellington played living genius Stephen Fry.

Evil Revolutionary from Blackadder

The evil revolutionary is a character that appears in the Blackadder the third episode Nob and Nobility.  Played by Chris Barrie, (most famous for his role as Rimmer in Red Dwarf), he only appears in one episode, but what an episode! His best quote from this Blackadder episode is: read more

Blackadder Joins The 20 Minuters – Home in time for tea and medals

Captain Blackadder, Lieutenant George, and Private Baldrick see joining the Air Corps as a great way of sitting in a classroom instead of fighting on the front lines. Unfortunately for them, the course is taught by Squadron Commander Flashheart, who lives for danger- much like his nemesis, the infamous Red Baron.
the 20 Minuters recruitment drive from Blackadder

Plot Synopsis for Private Plane

Blackadder joins the Royal Flying Corps in order to escape the trenches.

Unfortunately, on his maiden flight as a “20-minuter”, Blackadder – with navigator Baldrick at his side – is shot-down behind German lines, and captured by their number 1 flying ace, Baron Von Richthoven. read more

Blackadder Goes Forth Quote – Asthmatic Ant

This Blackadder Goes Forth Quote about the asthmatic ant is one of the best from the show! The perfect way to sum up the First World War in 1 sentence!

Blackadder Goes Forth Quote – Asthmatic Ant

This line came from the final episode of Blackadder Goes Forth. Arguably, there has never been a finer piece of television written and recorded before or after.

How did the War start?

Blackadder’s explanation of how the war started is also a memorable moment from this episode. Check out this Blackadder scene below.

Apparently the plan was bollocks. The strange thing being that nothing seems to have changed when it comes to politics and war until this day. And the poor old ostrich died for nothing! read more

Baldrick or Mrs. Miggins – Who would you start a family with?

Who would you try to start a family with – Baldrick or Mrs. Miggins? This quote is from Amy and Amiability third series Blackadder.

Start a family with Baldrick or Mrs. M?

The funniest Blackadder quotes from the third series found online

Amy and Amiability

This quote is from the third series of Blackadder. You can read the full script here >> Amy and Amiability Blackadder. The real question though, is who would you prefer to start a family with? Let’s take a look at Mrs. Miggins.

Mrs. Miggins

Played by Helen Atkinson-Wood, Mrs. Miggins is referred to in the second series of Blackadder as owning a Pie Shop. The most memorable reference is probably from the second series with the Baby Eating Bishop of Bath and Wells. read more

Something is always wrong – Blackadder Quote

Something is always wrong Balders. The fact that I am not a millionaire aristocrat with the sexual capacity of a rutting rhino is a constant niggle.

Something is always wrong


This classic Blackadder quote is taken from the third series – Ink and Incapability.

Something is always wrong

One of the main features of the Blackadder character during the third series, was that Blackadder was unhappy with his position in life.

Blackadder pelican quote

Blackadder in the First Series

Some of this is to deliberately highlight the fact that Blackadder is slowly reducing in social status from the first series.  Here, he played the Prince for most of the series, finally being elevated to King on his death bed. read more